M'aider! M'aider!

There was a moment early on in the Mayday festivities in New York City that qualified as surreal. An elderly Chinese woman took a break from toting her “immigrant rights now” sign through Union Square and took off her shoes to rest her feet and talk with some friends. Moments later, a young, scruffy college student walked past and offered her a copy of “the socialist worker.” She laughed and shook her head. It may or may not have occurred to our young idealist (in a beret, no less) that this woman in all likelihood risked her life to escape a communist country.
This is not an attempt to undermine his efforts or scoff at university idealism, just a way to highlight some of the noticeable changes that have taken place since the first large scale mayday immigrant rights marches two years ago.
I was in Los Angeles that day in 2006 and I was awed as a spectator. I saw the peaceful, powerful message being sent and was touched, even inspired. Close to a million people made their way through the downtown streets with a simple message: we’re here and it’s our America, too. Generations of families marched side by side because, as one young protestor told me: I don’t want to lose my mom.
On this day in Union Square, there were noticeable differences. For one, the turnout was minimal. Less than 1000 people, even. And it looked suspiciously like many other disorganized laundry list lefty parades I’ve been to in the past 10 years. The Mumia people were there, the socialists, the animal rights people, police brutality folks, Iraq vets against the war, groups carrying signs with Hitler moustaches drawn on the president’s face: the message of immigrant rights was lost in the confused and frustrated stew of liberal outrage.
The people who generally burn the American flag at their events were marching with people who understand the flag’s significance more than most: people who risked their lives to come here, work and very much buy into the system. It reminds me of what I saw when I visited the UC Berkeley Campus after the bombing started in Afghanistan in 2001. People were out there, too, with their vegan signs and their racial justice pamphlets: worthwhile causes, mind you, but it all becomes a numbing static blur when you get away from the central issue.
Some of those undocumented people might LIKE George Bush or think Mumia should fry. It’s an ignorant assumption that people demanding immigrant rights will want to get on the animal rights bandwagon. Contrary to the conventional argument, it’s not all the same fight.
It should be noted, though, that a lot has changed in the past two years concerning the fight for immigrant rights. Raids by the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency have torn apart families and destroyed communities in pockets all over America. It has become evident, also, that as a result of the economic downturn in this country, fewer Latino immigrants are sending money to their families back home. Most people I talked to said that fewer people came out this year because they’re either afraid of being detained or they can’t afford to take a day off work.
We should also remember, however, that the son of an immigrant is running for president. The politics of identity force us to stop at Barack Obama’s blackness, forgetting that he is the son of a man who came to America for a new life, just as all of those who march did.
Mayday is kind of a wacky holiday to begin with, however. It’s a pagan holiday that got blended with the Virgin Mary and eventually came to represent the struggle for workers rights. Except, of course, Americans celebrate their workers rights holiday months from now with barbecue and Home Depot shopping on a monday.
Until 2006, Mayday in America wasn’t much more than a time for campus communists to hand out papers and for others to celebrate “loyalty day” (which is what the US government changed the holiday to back in the cold war after the soviets adopted it) by dancing around a pole. Only after the immigrant rights movement adopted it did it become a significant American Holiday (however unofficial).
And after that significant turn, it almost feels more significant here than in most of the world. Barring demonstrations in Turkey and the Philippines (among other countries), where people marched in response to soaring food prices, most of the world’s Maydays this year seem obsolete. An old woman in the Ukraine holds a picture of Lenin, crying. Thousands march through Havana with portraits of the now nearly irrelevant Fidel Castro.
Even in America, organized labor seems a little outdated. Yesterday, a union boss in Indiana gave his endorsement of Hillary Clinton, saying America needs a leader with “testicular fortitude”.
Keeping in mind a disappointing turnout in most American cities this year, the fight is still significant. The voice still resonates. And particularly now, with the difficulties America is facing.
Another curious anniversary celebrated on Mayday: Five years ago on May 1st, our president stood on the deck of the USS Abraham Lincoln and declared Mission Accomplished in Iraq.
The phrase “mayday” is also used by pilots and policemen as a distress call over the radio. It has nothing to do with theday itself, the phrase is an anglicized version of the French phrase m’aider, which means literally: “help me”.
It is fitting, then, that on this day, with all that we have to contend with in present day America, the future of our country, our recent immigrants, can celebrate the anniversary of the day they first made their voices heard.

Who Are These Women?: A Dispatch from Philadelphia

I’m concerned that this election is turning me into a misogynist.

Last night, I watched Hillary Clinton deliver her victory speech in a hotel in downtown Philadelphia, cringing. I looked around nervously and realized I was in a ballroom full of my mom. Instantly, I became terrified of this middle-aged white woman army, marching through America, stomping young people’s dreams out with their sensible shoes.

After the address, I shared an elevator with several of them, one of whom gleefully snapped, “That and his change didn’t get him Pennsylvania.” Her girlfriends giggled as they emptied the elevator on their way to taunt the Obama supporters who had gathered outside the hotel, one of them with a bullhorn tucked under her arm.

This is a reflection of a lot of these women’s attitudes, as if they resent the notion of change.

It occurs to me, though, that it is not strictly a gender issue. I also take issue with these women because of their age. I am not a declared Obama supporter (though if I vote, I might vote for him), but the attitude of these women is pushing me toward his camp.

Every event I go to, I see them circled up, uttering the phrase, “it’s our turn.” I don’t know what that means. I have come to see Clinton as every teacher, nun, mom, principal and judge who gleefully punished and scolded me my entire life. I see myself in Obama, not because of his ideas or his race, but as a victim of the tyranny of bossy old women.

Outside of the hotel, a group of Clinton supporters yelled at a passing car of Obama supporters, chanting “we won.” I got the sense that when they say “we” they they mean women. I don’t know how to hide this disdain any more. It’s embarrassing. It’s awful. But it’s in me. By the same token, this must be the same thing that latent racists are experiencing in response to Obama.

Hillary’s victory speech came at the end of a long day for me, witnessing the glee and enthusiasm of young Obama supporters in the streets of Philadelphia.

I covered the forgettable election in 2004 with the aim of extracting the “youth voice," a perspective of a new political generation. The problem came when I realized there was no new political generation, just a lot of old people poisoning young minds to fall in line.

During the Republican Convention, George Lucas told me that the world was controlled by corrupt old people twisting malleable, idealistic young minds. As a result, all of the young people I talked to during that disastrous campaign were more interested in drugs, alcohol and baseball. It was nearly impossible to get anybody to talk about the election.

I felt nerdy, like I was trying to draw members of my generation into a debate about Star Trek. Now, almost regrettably, I can’t escape political discussions.

I’m realizing, after my visit to Philadelphia, that a generational divide is developing as a result of this election that might not ever be repaired -- not that it should be. Tuesday morning, I boarded a bus in New York’s Chinatown for Philadelphia’s Chinatown on the other end.

I sat next to a young Ghanaian college student who grew up in New York and the conversation quickly became political. I didn’t even bring it up, he just started offering his opinions on Hillary, Barack and the tax code. “The rebates don’t make any sense”, as he pushes his glasses back on his forehead. Not surprisingly, he’s an Obama supporter.

As I made my way off the bus in Philadelphia, I entered the realm of election mania. Market Street was crowded with Black teenagers toting hand painted Obama signs and singing double dutch rhymes.

Street vendors lined the street, selling t-shirts with slogans like, “Stop the drama. Vote Obama.”

There was even a dress code: Phillies hat, Obama t-shirt. And spotted in the crowd were some odd anomalies: middle aged white women in visors, clutching Hillary signs, looking scared of roving packs of the young and colorful -- with the occasional black Clinton supporter or older white female Obama backer blowing up the sterotype.

I made my way through downtown to meet with a woman, Mrs. Hopson, who is volunteering for Obama’s campaign in Philadelphia. She is a middle aged black woman, newly politicized. In 1980, she was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and as a result, she is in a wheelchair, though she leads a very active life. She’s always voted, but she tells me she’s never been particularly excited. I was curious if she was ever torn in the course of this election. She laughed and shook her head. “I was never conflicted. From the beginning, I knew I was for Hillary. And then Barack got in it and, well . . . “

From Mrs. Hopson’s house, I made my way to City Hall, where supporters of both campaigns had gathered to wave signs and chant at passing cars.

It was a massive collection of people, crowding the steps of this city’s iconic center to capacity. It was peaceful, but there was tension, with both camps trying to “out-chant” each other. O-ba-ma and Hil-la-ry can be shouted in the same cadence.

I realized that if you took away all the signs and t-shirts, it would still be easy to identify who was who. One side of the stairs was crowded by the post-feminism feminists with color treated hair and dour looks of Clinton’s camp.

The other side was busy with the young, jubilant and multicultural people of Obama’s team. As they turned their chants towards each other, it became a jarring, battling symphony of adolescent enthusiasm versus menopausal angst.

I made my way to South Philly to meet up with some friends, a young couple who just bought a home in this historic neighborhood. After work, they went to the elementary school on the corner to vote together. I don’t want to project anything onto their relationship, but they’re clearly in love and excited about starting a life together.

I was happy to walk with them and share that moment. They’re not strictly “political people,” but they’re aware and invested, which is increasingly common in my generation. For the first time, I felt like I was witnessing the future unfold: a young, interracial couple, optimistic and happy.

Hours later, I was entrenched in the ugliness and entitlement of the baby boomers, as the numbers came in and Pennsylvania broke, predictably, for Hillary.

Pope Benedict XVI in the Holy City

The day before Pope Benedict was to arrive in New York City on his first visit here as vicar, as God on earth - a taxicab burst into flames on Fifth Avenue.

It could not be extinguished and policemen and firemen cleared the street, closed it to traffic as the yellow Ford smoldered, alone in the middle of five lanes. This oddity, which hurt no one, occurred in the middle of the most elegant shopping drag in the free world. It burnt amid Cartier and Chanel and Tiffany's and directly in front of St. Patrick's cathedral, where Benedict XIV said mass only days later.

Curious, anxious Catholic that I am, I took this as a miracle. I took the burning cab as a modern day burning bush, here in the holy city of New York, an omen. An announcement. I listened for updates, straining my ears for the voice of God.

Throughout my life, I have turned to the Catholic Church (and not necessarily God) for guidance in difficult times. At fifteen, as my chest heaved from running to escape a court ordered institution, my partner Gustavo and I paused in a corn field for a moment to ask God for a car to steal so we could get away before the police came. He heard our pleas and as thanks, we later attended mass at the same parish where I served as altar boy.

We spoke to the priest afterwards, the three of us leaning on the hood of our stolen car in the parking lot, smoking cigarettes, and he advised that we turn ourselves in.

I am what my mother calls a “cultural Catholic.” An Irish Mexican Kentuckian from California, my Catholicism was my strongest identifier growing up. And still, my faith long since questioned and largely washed away, I get ashes on Ash Wednesday. I wear a scapular, assuring my entrance to heaven. I cross myself on planes at take off and landing. And when the Pope comes to visit, I see a burning cab as a messenger from God.

I call New York a holy city and I mean that. I realize that truth more and more now, as a recent transplant to New York from San Francisco. It is a city of shrines and holy places: to Babe Ruth in Yankee Stadium, to commercialism in Times Square and the holy of holies, to expansive wealth itself in the form of a bronze bull (father of a golden calf) at the foot of Wall Street.

I am a young person, in the midst of my obligatory American pilgrimage to New York City. Success! Trial by fire! We are actors, writers, dancers, models, piano players, tunneling each day for hours, clawing through the sewers from places like Williamsburg to emerge in the dazzling light of an island of staggering wealth and boundless opportunity. A holy city.

It has become such a protected shrine of wealth that you can no longer find homeless people or beggars on the street in Manhattan. They’ve been banished, in the same sweep by a Catholic mayor that turned Times Square into an elaborate parody of the Las Vegas parody of New York: pornography theaters turned into the most ostentatious Applebee's in America, the most opulent Olive Garden.

And awaiting the Pope’s arrival, I had to ask myself what his interpretation of this place would be. There is no room for the poor here. No room for the soul, even. Would he be like Jesus in the temple of cheaters and misers, tipping over tables and shouting?

Where would he visit? What would he say? As it turns out, he visited the holiest places in the holy city: Ground Zero and Yankee Stadium. These places, incidentally, are the inspiration for the majority of tattoos in this city, as well: a Yankees logo on one bicep, “Never Forget” on the other.

The Pope’s visit to Ground Zero is particularly eerie, praying over what is still in our minds, rubble. A destroyed monument of wealth. It feels biblical, like Jericho or Jerusalem. But there was no such profundity. Pope Benedict breezed through here like a rock star, shaking hands, waving. He prayed along classic themes: peace on earth, benevolence. And people came out for that.

People cried and cheered. They sang and prayed. It wasn’t earth shattering or life altering for any one that I could see, though. The flaming cab predicted nothing. And now Benedict is gone.

When I was younger, my mother and I would go to church together every Sunday. I was a teenager and these were difficult times in our relationship - shortly before she moved out - but we still went together, just she and I. I was the altar boy and she was the lector. Afterwards, we would go to a donut shop on Clement Street for something to eat. We didn’t usually talk. She would page through the bulletin, sipping her coffee. I would watch the old Chinese men smoke cigarettes and play cards, laughing and yelling. Not earth shattering or life altering, but these are some of my most pleasant memories of time spent with my mother.

The Pope’s presence here, though brief and kind of mundane, solidifies New York as a holy city. His choice to visit here, to visit Fifth Avenue and Ground Zero and Yankee Stadium makes those places that much holier. And to see the throngs of people lining the street, crying and cheering, indicates that his visit breathed some love and benevolence into a generally soulless place, if just for a couple of days.

Tibetan Monks and Frat Boys Unite!

As the U.S. dollar marinates in the world economy’s toilet and as we consider whether to elect a woman or a black man president, and our young people limit their political outrage to wearing ironic T-shirts, it’s a good thing that China is becoming the "evil-er" empire.

It might just give us a breather to re-brand America.

Last Saturday when I read a report that local authorities had tear-gassed a large group of Michigan State students I was at once shocked and inspired. After five years of war and 4000 American casualties, young people in America, I thought, had risen up in defiance.

As I read further, however, I discovered that the melee was not an anti-war protest, but was instead prompted by a group of rowdy frat boys with bellies full of Jägermeister, throwing bottles and trash at police officers. In fact, it was such a Mountain Dew rush for them to be attacking the police that at one point, they began chanting “TEAR GAS! TEAR GAS!” in the hopes that the cops would invent a new X-Treme Doritos flavor in their eyeballs.

This news broke in the same week that people in London and Paris caused international spectacles by disrupting the passage of the Olympic torch in protest of China’s human rights abuses. It also came less than a month after real riots exploded in Tibet, where businesses were burned and people killed. The amount of negative attention being paid to China right now gives me some hope that the United States can pass the torch of international scorn on to them.

China’s troubles continued throughout the week, specifically in San Francisco, as thousands gathered and protested the Olympic torch (while others gathered to support it, mostly Chinese) and others gathered just to take pix of well-protected Olympic torch runners.

For most of us, knowledge of Tibet is limited to obscure blips on the popular culture radar: Eddie Murphy in The Golden Child, cracking wise with Buddhist monks, Brad Pitt lost in the Himalayas, and the Beastie Boys’ habit of hosting epic concerts in the name of the struggle. I’m not saying any of this to degrade my generation or give the tired mockery of an ignorant American populace. I certainly don’t mean to undermine the nature of the Tibetan struggle, but it’s just so far removed from relevance when you put it in an American context. But the fact that China has become a nation on the verge of superpower status that has an even more atrocious reputation than the United States is a good thing for the United States.

I mean we get a break for a minute, with the focus on the other empire, and we should try and ride it out. While the world is distracted by an “evil-er evil,” we can use the time to focus on electing a president and answering questions like, “How can we not turn into a poverty-stricken nation of train hopping drunken hobos?” and “Why not have talks with Iran?”

If we do that, by the time the last eastern European growth-stunted teenaged gymnast has tossed her last hula-hoop and China is still beating the world off its back, we’ll have a new America to present to the world. All the kids with Obama stickers on their backpacks will do their homework and be able to explain an effective international intervention in Darfur, a two state solution for Israel and Palestine, a reasonable Iraq troop withdrawal timetable, a long term alternative energy plan, an economic stimulus package, heath care reform and a fair immigration policy.

After that mess is sorted, America’s young people can assemble a life from the rubble and adopt the post-empire lifestyle of Europe: drafting manifestos and drinking wine while passing harsh political judgment on those rich, arrogant, imperialist pigs with all the good movies: the Chinese.

Tupac Obama: The Real Dream Ticket

I can remember very clearly where I was when I learned that Tupac Shakur was dead. It was a pivotal and momentous event in my young life and I will always be able to tell the story of where I was when I heard the news.

On Wednesday morning as Barack Obama delivered his now famous address on race in America, I again knew that I was witnessing something that I would remember for the rest of my life.

I draw that parallel between two radically different men (a convicted rapist and the former editor of the Harvard law review) to highlight a startling truth: those men have captivated, intrigued and inspired my generation more than any other person I can name.

Tupac Shakur’s name is on more lips than usual this week because the LA Times ran a front page story Monday which yet again rattled the cage of mystery surrounding his death. The story quotes several unnamed sources (jailhouse snitches, most of them) who claim that Sean “P Diddy” Combs had prior knowledge of an attack on Tupac.

The attack, which did not go according to plan, is the event that ignited the now fossilized “east coast west coast beef” of the mid-nineties which ended in the deaths of both Tupac and Notorious BIG. (Biggy Smalls)

The LA Times has published some other preposterous garbage concerning these murders, one such story contained a claim that Biggie gave a Crip a million dollars and his own gun to kill Tupac. I would not be surprised if Chuck Phillips, the reporter filing these stories, has a screenplay he wants to sell because the sum of these stories is essentially unsubstantiated Hollywood foolishness.

But Maybe I’m off base. Maybe Phillips and the editors at the Times are onto something. Maybe, for example, Tupac really did roll a joint while dripping blood from five bullet holes (as Phillips’ piece reports), but I’m more inclined to say that this story smells like caca. (Something closer to the truth can be foundin a book called Labyrinth, which implicates members of the LAPD in both murders.) As it turns out, however, it doesn’t really matter.

As I read the story, I wondered if this case is even relevant any more. The kids who are buying rap records now (or downloading them on itunes, whatever) were six years old when Tupac was killed. They still wear t-shirts with his picture on them and can quote his songs, but they only know him as a figure. The mystery surrounding his death isn’t relevant because the only Tupac they know is a dead icon, a hallowed saint of American rap history.

This is the only way I ever knew JFK.

Mentioning Kennedy in this context brings me back to the enthusiasm which members of my generation share concerning Barack Obama’s candidacy. We’ve never seen a politician like this: a man who intrigues and unites, speaks frankly and eloquently about race and inspires historically apathetic young men and women to participate in the democratic process.

We’ve only heard stories about the men like this that came before. And we also know that all of them were shot and killed and had high schools named after them.

Tupac’s legacy is in line with the Kennedy’s and Dr. King’s if only in his ability to inspire and communicate. In fact, aside from the truth that Shakur and Obama are both attractive black men, the only thing they really have in common is that they are both incredibly gifted orators.

My generation values an effective communicator and that’s fitting, as we came up in the communication age. Tupac showed us that you can be a super communicator: a rapper, actor, poet and, yes, even a politician.

This is a footnote from Tupac’s story that often goes overlooked. At the time of his murder, he was flirting with politics, speaking at voter registration drives in South Central Los Angeles.

True conspiracy theorists have floated the idea that the US Government killed Tupac because they saw his potential power as a political leader and were threatened by it. I wouldn’t go that far, but I would say that if he wasn’t killed and he decided on a life in politics, he would have done quite well, criminal record be damned.

I spent most of the day on Tuesday after Obama’s staggeringly eloquent speech puzzling over these men and their respective resonance with people of my generation. As evening approached, it occurred to me that while I’ve been to countless political events this campaign season, it’s been quite a while since I went to a hip-hop show. So I got off my Brooklyn couch and went into the city to see Masta Ace (of "Born to Roll" fame) perform and ask some people what they thought of the new development in the Tupac case.

When I first got to the club, I was pleased to discover that even on a cold Tuesday night, hip-hop can still bring a crowd. The activity in front of the venue was dominated by a group of about 20 young black kids pouring out of a white hummer limo with New Jersey plates, dressed impeccably and ostentatiously in silver shoes, gold teeth and blindingly white baseball hats.

Their arrival punctuated by the clink of empty Hennessey bottles falling from the back seat of the limo and onto the Manhattan sidewalk.

I went inside behind them, trying to blend into the entourage and spent some time at the bar, watching the show. After a while, I made my way across the room and walked past a familiar face in the crowd, a man I recognized as Q-Tip from the wildly famous and influential Queens rap group A Tribe Called Quest. I managed to get his attention and ask a couple questions about the Tupac case.

He was very quick to strike down the speculation about Puffy as divisive; something hip-hop doesn’t need right now. When I asked him if the deaths of Tupac and Biggie were still relevant, he smacked his lips and told me, “Of course it’s relevant. These are our icons. But all this mess isn’t going to bring them back.”

I nodded and thanked him for his time. It is a sign of our gradual maturing that my generation’s mantle of icons has expanded to allow room for someone like Barack Obama. It is the hope of millions of young people that he can appeal to the rest of America, who are older and whiter and decidedly not Tupac fans.

Bring Back the White Guys

Recently, my uncle Godfrey bought me a copy of Shelby Steele’s short book on Obama, which has included in the subtitle: “why he can’t win.” Steele’s argument is layered, but as a black man and ardent critic of affirmative action, he’s afraid Obama could be elected because he’s black and that would be a problem for a number of reasons. Steele calls Obama’s campaign a “morality play,” wherein Americans are acting out the guilt, innocence, victimization and redemption of our history.

I think in most ways, Steele is off-base and then I consider the man who gave me this book. My uncle was born and raised in Harlem. He worked his way to Howard University and through medical school and in the 1970s became the first black doctor at his hospital of residence in Manhattan, encountering a lot of resistance along the way. In this way, among others, he has a broader lens on the racial history of America. He is a fervent Obama supporter and blames Clinton for the negative shift in the campaign, going so far as to say that if she wins the nomination, he’ll become a Republican and vote for John McCain.

For most young Americans, this will not translate quite the same. I’ve said it before, but if Clinton and the machine get the nomination, the kids will stay home. And the tactic at this point seems to be: say he’s black, say he’s Muslim and highlight his other-ness, which seems to be resonating with poor white people in America.

It’s such a dirty trick that I can only stammer and ask, “Hillary, how do you justify having racists as your base?” Geraldine Ferraro, a Clinton supporter and former democratic vice presidential nominee, said Obama only made it this far because he was black. (I know, Geraldine, black guys get all the breaks in America.) There’s a twisted echo of Shelby Steele in there, although she’s saying something quite different. She’s rallying the women, who are the yin to the racists’ yang of Clinton’s success strategy. It’s kind of sickening.

Representative Steve King of Iowa had some, amazingly, more absurd comments on a potential Obama presidency, implying that Al Qaeda would be dancing in the streets if he were elected. This comes in the wake of middle-name-gate, the “leak” of Obama’s photo in traditional muslim attire and, of course, Clinton’s now infamous “are your children safe at 3AM from some black guy” television ads.

I didn’t want to have to think of it in any of these terms. In the beginning, it seemed like Obama didn’t want to get into the identity politics of it and people were going to respect that. He was, after all, stepping onto the pulpit in some wild times, in the shadow of stories like Michael Richard’s onstage ni--er tirade, the plight of the Jena 6 and Don Imus’ nappy headed hoes comment.

But his decision to stand apart from the more victimization-oriented black leaders that grew out of the civil rights era meant yes, Shelby Steele was right and Obama, in a way, was agreeing to a bargain: “If you don’t remind white people of what they did to you before, they won’t remind you that you’re black.” This has worked for the young, educated and wealthy white people of his base. Not so much with the old, uneducated and poor people of Clinton’s camp.

But oh well. The naivete and optimism of youth has its limits. Where young people saw an opportunity to transcend dark points of America’s history and write a new chapter independent of race and identity, others saw a chance to tear down something meaningful and potentially great. In an ultra obscure parallel, it reminds me of the French children’s film The Red Balloon.

The movie is the short story of a young boy who finds a red balloon on the streets of Paris that has magical powers. It can follow the boy even when he’s not holding the string. When the bus driver says the balloon cannot come on board, the balloon races behind to keep up with the boy. The headmaster says the balloon cannot come into school with him, so it waits outside until school is done. The balloon offers wonder and adventure for the boy until, inevitably, the balloon attracts the attention of a group of bullies, who begin hurling rocks at it.

I wont give away the ending, just say that this is a good illustration of where we find ourselves right now. I don’t to pretend that Barack Obama is the messiah or even the right person for the job, necessarily. But he is resonating with my generation in a way that nobody ever has before. If we reduce this thing to identity politics and force Obama to fight back, we’ll be yearning for the days when we could ignore whatever anonymous, white males were up for the spot until November and then shrug as we checked a box for “whoever”.

It makes me wish we could bring back the white guys and have them run this race, old school style. Somebody call John Edwards. Get him back out here. I thought we were ready for this, but I was wrong. We’re still just ankle biting racist woman haters and we deserve old, crusty white men for the next 200 years.

What If The Millenials Lose? : A Dispatch From the Rhode Island Primary

PROVIDENCE, R.I. -- I got a text message from a friend the morning after Tuesday’s primaries. The newly politicized young, Latino Obama supporter asked me, “Should I be concerned?"

To be honest, I didn’t know what to say to him. I have been swept up in the romance of the Obama campaign since Iowa, not because I specifically support him, but because I’ve never in my life seen my generation take an active and enthusiastic role in the political process, discard cynicism and embrace a person and an idea like this. As a result, I suppose that romance tainted my perception of the Hillary campaign, equating in my mind with stagnation and old, tired and dirty politics. Maybe that’s fair, maybe it’s not.

I would go so far as to say that if Hillary pulls off the upset and gets the nomination, it's going to alienate the generation that finally cared.

I can say with certainty that it would alienate me and I’m scared because I can see the clouds of Hillary’s perfect storm in the sky starting to form. The dirty trick of trying to include Florida and Michigan’s delegates, where Obama’s name wasn’t even on the ballot, is one aspect. The absurd attack ads as part of her kitchen sink strategy, is another. And looking forward past the next six weeks or so, when she’ll phone in enough favors to take Pennsylvania, it looks like she could do it.

If these legions of young believers are slain by the machine, I wouldn’t blame any of them for turning away from politics altogether. It’s almost as if Hillary’s nomination would confirm the validity of apathy.

I spent the day of the primaries in Rhode Island, a politically curious but largely ignored state. I covered a lot of ground in one day, from college campuses to a proverbial “smoke-filled room” and on to the after parties. At every step, I saw examples of enthusiastic young people who believed for the first time that they were having a political impact. By the end of the night, I saw confused faces and heard the voices of people who felt betrayed.

Monday evening, I walked into Providence from the train station and headed directly across the street to Uno’s. I struck up a conversation with my pregnant bartender Jesse and tried to explain what I was doing there. I told her, “It’s such a critical day and nobody seems to be paying any attention to Rhode Island.” She just smiled and said, “Nobody ever pays attention to Rhode Island.”

And it’s true. This state is the birthplace of the industrial revolution in the United States; it was the first colony to denounce allegiance to Great Britain; and it’s where much of Jim Carrey’s epic buffoonery in “Dumb and Dumber” took place. And yet, it escaped national attention on a day when the Democratic nomination could have been decided.

After some time at Uno’s, my host Joe came in and met me, walking in to familiar welcomes. He tried to explain the less-than complex political process here. “Rhode Island is a fiercely Democratic state. People go in the booth and they just pull the Democrat lever.” (Though he pronounces it “leh-vah”).

That’s fine, except in this case, those fiercely Democratic voters are choosing between two Democrats.

Joe works in construction in Providence, so he gave me a tour of a block in his neighborhood where he’s fixed, built and sold several homes. It’s jokingly referred to as the futuristic district. (The fyoo-cha is now!) The surrounding neighborhood is mixed-income, largely working-class and it sits in the shadow of the state building, a marvelous white marble domed structure topped with a bronze statue of “Independent Man,” a representation of the state’s historically independent nature. If Rhode Island had a super hero, it would be him. And rightly so. As “fiercely Democratic” as they may be, the majority of voters here are registered independents.

Somehow Joe manages to get me out of bed before 8:30 the morning of election day. We head to the Capital Hill Diner for egg sandwiches and coffee. There I meet Will, a young electrical contractor who has already voted. Will, who is black, explains to me, “Too many of my ancestors died so I could vote. I have to.”

Leaving the diner, I pass Carol Tower, the polling place for the neighborhood. One older woman walks out smiling, wearing a t-shirt that reads, “Obama is my homeboy.”

The rain starts coming down pretty heavily and I head back to the futuristic district to visit with Chris, a young carpenter who lives in one of the houses there. I walk with him over to the Carol Towers to cast his vote. He tells me his mom has been calling him all day, reminding him to vote and specifically, to vote for Obama. He says, “Our parents are realizing they messed everything up and now they’re desperate, telling us it’s our job to fix it.” Chris makes it to the Tower a couple of minutes before the polls close and walks in smiling.

Across the street, I meet up with Lisa, a local organizer who has agreed to give me a tour of some of Providence’s back rooms. She drives out to the waterfront, where we go to the Fabre Line club to have a drink while we watch some of the results trickle in on TV. The club got its name from the boat that carried immigrants around the turn of the century from Ellis Island over to Providence for processing. Now the club is a shining example of America’s promise: the descendants of those immigrants gather here to make deals and rub elbows.

In a back room, some of these guys — older, heavy set — are sitting around a board table in leather swivel chairs, watching MSNBC. One of them is literally chomping on a cigar nub. Rhode Island is the first state to be called for Hillary, and everyone just seems stunned. Even most of these old, white Democrats have bought into the Obama movement.

From there, we head over to a bar called McKellans, where Hillary’s supporters have gathered to celebrate. It’s pretty tame, however enthusiastic the crowd, and it’s a good place to meet women, as out of the 100 or so people there, a striking majority is female. Most of the men are older guys in sharp suits. I see a girl with platinum blonde hair, wearing red pumps and a miniskirt made out of a Hillary campaign poster. She’s getting a lot of attention and people are calling out to her, addressing her as Hillary. I ask if that’s her real name and she tells me, “No, but I seem to be responding to it.” Clinton is way ahead in Ohio at this point and we decide to head over to the Obama party before it becomes bummertime.

The Obama gathering, not surprisingly, is a lot younger and decidedly more festive. As I walk in, there is a goofy drum and brass band performing, kind of a hip marching band that doesn’t march. The mood is still upbeat, despite Rhode Island being called for Clinton. Then, halfway through one of the band's more exuberant songs, the giant television behind them shows the news that Hillary has taken Ohio. Unaware, the band plays on, but the crowd wilts. They’re still trying to be upbeat, have a good time, but they’re visibly stunned. A young woman next to me shakes her head with a half laugh and asks, “How is this even possible?”

Moments later, the band stops and the volume is turned up on the television, which is playing Hillary’s acceptance speech. People start to trickle out; somebody boos. The party is over. Nobody wants to talk. I go home and refresh my computer until it tells me Texas has been called for Hillary as well.

A man named Chris Redfern, who is the Democratic Party Chairman in Ohio and has remained neutral, had a quote in the paper the other day, highlighting the difference between Clinton and Obama supporters. He said, “The Obama army is larger, more enthusiastic, more confident and they are young and naïve enough to think they can win.”

I don’t know what it means when a party insider says the enthusiastic supporters of the leading candidate must be naïve to believe in their man. It’s disheartening and a little scary. It’s sad to think that the race that made little Rhody voters turn out in record numbers might in some way be fixed. It’s enough to say that cynicism might be on its way back into fashion.